Monday, October 15, 2012


I think I might be getting used to going to social functions alone.  It doesn't fill me with fear or sadness these days.

Last night I went to my goddaughter's Engagement Dinner.  Without Cliff, clearly.

I enjoyed every minute ... I wallowed in memories of her ... the first time I held her, aged 48 hours ... to the little pig-tailed cutie, the teenager ... now a gorgeous auburn haired beauty of a woman.  My heart is happy for her ... I immediately liked loved her fiancé and his parents too.  It was a great night.  Lovely to be ensconced into my BFF's family - a place I feel very much at home.

And the food was .... mmmmmmmm nom nom nom.  A hearty soup, pasta ragu, sorbet, cappuccino and one vodka and diet coke :-)

I did cry when I parked in the driveway, but mainly because I knew the heating and hot water wasn't working and the temperature had dropped to zero ... and because, well it's an emotional thing ... realising your goddaughter has got engaged and the years have gone .... when DID she grow up.  How did THAT happen.  How are my BFF and I both nearing the big 5-0?

I was thinking about this "getting used to thing" and couldn't decide if it was a good thing, or whether I should be sad that I'm in this place.  I think he'd be happy for me though.  And, then I checked out my widow friend Lynette's blog, to find she'd written along the same lines.  Weird huh?  No wonder we're off to Hawaii together in a year's time.

Here's the big speech from last night - it's marvellous.  Very British.  Very funny.  


  1. the years are passing and life goes on and it's cruddy that it does. how do we keep going? they want us to. i'm glad you have a friend in Lynette. a trip together is something to look forward to and something to share with her. a kindred spirit. i'm still looking for a friend. someone to look for me if i'm not there for a few days, or to reach out to me. to chat. very hard doing this alone. i wish you all the comfort and love and peace and support. so glad you have family and friends. keep posting. i live vicariously.

  2. Dear abandonedsouls.. You are not alone. I too feel this is cruddy actually it sucks! There i,ve said it. You have friend in NJ. Email me anytime.
    Huggs Michele