I need to remember not to trust blindly.
Because he is not here.
Weighing up the disappointments next to the goodness in my life gives me perspective.
I am lucky.
I have some very good people around me.
I have my family, his family, Vicki, Spike, Gaynor, Tina, Liz, Eve, other friends and friends/colleagues at work, his friends (and they are the most loyal people you'll ever come across), and beautiful friends from both the boarding schools that I went to, and they wrap me in love and solid advice from afar. Not to mention new friends who I have not met and may never meet, but I still class them as my friends - people whose blogs I follow, people who I talk to on the Grief Healing Boards.
Other people's actions and values are not my responsibility.
It is my responsibility however to be aware of their standards, and trust them accordingly.
I've been here before, and must remember the lesson. That's what he'd tell me.
The world isn't such an ugly and frightening place after all.
It's just that it seems that way sometimes.