Sunday, August 2, 2009

Happier today

I need to remember not to trust blindly.

I can't.

Because he is not here.

Weighing up the disappointments next to the goodness in my life gives me perspective.

I am lucky.

I have some very good people around me.

I have my family, his family, Vicki, Spike, Gaynor, Tina, Liz, Eve, other friends and friends/colleagues at work, his friends (and they are the most loyal people you'll ever come across), and beautiful friends from both the boarding schools that I went to, and they wrap me in love and solid advice from afar. Not to mention new friends who I have not met and may never meet, but I still class them as my friends - people whose blogs I follow, people who I talk to on the Grief Healing Boards.

Other people's actions and values are not my responsibility.

It is my responsibility however to be aware of their standards, and trust them accordingly.

I've been here before, and must remember the lesson. That's what he'd tell me.

The world isn't such an ugly and frightening place after all.

It's just that it seems that way sometimes.


  1. I look forward to every post you make, because you always seem to say the things I can't. BIG hug to you, my new friend.


  2. I'm so glad you are feeling happier today. It is so easy to let the useless people eat away at our fragile confidence. Lean your weight on the broad shoulders of the people who offer unconditional support and love, and leave the others behind where you can.
    Like you, I find that the new friends I have made both in Real Life and on the Net are one of the things that make this horrid journey bearable. xxx

  3. Kim, thanks so much for your lovely words. I am reading your blog and will add it to my blog list - I think it is so tender and honest.

    J - good true advice ... I just need to be strong and not take the easy/lazy option then freak out when they act the way I know they will! I'll get there, slowly slowly xx