Tuesday, August 18, 2009

A can of tomatoes

It's the little things.

It's always the little things that set you off.

Having spent Sunday morning with Shaun and Gary, I found myself on a more even keel ... felt stronger again. They had scared my imaginary monsters away.

Then I opened my cupboard door last night and started howling when I looked at the tin of tomatoes.

Because he had bought them.

Because he looked after me in such a fundamental way.

Because he loved me so much.

Because he cared so much.

Because he had so much patience with me.

Because he had held the tin of tomatoes and I could visualize his hands and the exact shade of skin colour of his hands.

Because he won't be buying tins of tomatoes anymore.


  1. Boo,
    You're right, it's the little things that get us, like opening the cupboard and seeing a can of tomoatoes that our wonderful husband bought. I'm sure we will sail around Cape Fear (and are probably sailing there every day), Cape of Good Hope and Cape Horn (though I don't want to go there since one of Austin's sailing goals was to sail our boat around Cape Horn). But we will make it to calmer seas, and we will be able to open our cupboards without crying. Keep breathing!


  2. In my cupboard right now is a jar of pasta sauce and a bag of penne that we bought the day before he passed away. They are just sitting there. I can't throw them out because they are the last things that he bought. And it really sucks because it is an absolutely YUMMY jar of sauce that I can't get anywhere in town.

    So here's my thought--on the next big "anniversary", I am going to make that pasta and sauce (if it still edible). And, if it turns out that it isn't, I am going to go and buy another jar of it and enjoy it through my tears.

    Take your tin of tomatoes and make something wonderful to eat and remember that Cliff wanted you to have them!!


    PS: LOVE the poster!

  3. Yep. The poster really made me smile.

    But ain't it the truth that it is the little things that hurt so much. R used to bring home the most awful promotional mugs that he had picked up at work. I hated them, and just stuck them at the back of the cupboard because he wouldn't let me throw them away. This evening, I went in the cupboard to find something entirely different and started howling at the sight of these awful mugs that I never wanted in the first place!

  4. Oh I wish we all lived closer to each other. I have a feeling we could really have a good laugh. It would be nice to just sit with people who "get it".

    I think I mentioned this to Lynette before, and she suggested that if we all lived in one area, we could call the town "Widowville" LOL