After having the whole of last week feeling ill (my immune system is still so low despite taking a Berocca a day) with an eye and ear infection that made me so dizzy that I was vomiting, which taunted me ... he's gone, he's gone, he's not here to help you or look after you anymore, I have managed to make one small step today.
I've managed to make myself go back to work. Not in the physical sense ... but I am working from home. I've managed to work, whilst crying almost solidly all morning. There were some short breaks from the crying ... and for that I am grateful ... work is a good distraction.
I am about to phone my Doctor's surgery to see if my prescription for anti-depressants is ready, so that I can re-join the world and try to start living AGAIN. I wonder how many times along this journey I am going to progress, then go backwards, then progress again. One step at a time, one day at a time. That's enough to cope with for now.
At least I'm doing my best to get back on the horse. Last week that was not an option.